‘If Only’ Idols
“The great human hunger is for love—for communion. Power, wealth, pleasure, freedom—each of these are powerful motivating forces which can seduce us into imagining that their presence will complete what is lacking in our lives. They are false lovers, idols that demolish our humanity rather than fulfill it. Yet we can make idols of people as well, especially if we think that by loving and being loved only by others near by we will find completion. We will find ourselves once again suffering set back and brokenness as a result of making either our love for the other person or group, or their love for us, the measure of our acceptance.
‘If only I was married’
‘If only I had married better!’
‘If only my friends were more with and for me.’
‘If only my parents loved me better.’
‘If only my children loved me as they ought.’
‘If only the people I work with really appreciated me.’This is the path to endless frustration, permanent anger, with self and others, as well as a misguided judgment about the truth of where we discover the only abiding, authentic love that can fulfill us. When we take that path of ‘looking for love in all the wrong places’ we turn legitimate gifts from God into idols. Work becomes slavery; sexuality becomes not a gift we give but a demand we make; position becomes a place of power to exercise rather than opportunity to give; wealth becomes a trap of fear rather than a means to bless; children become sources to fulfill parents or trophies to display rather than cherished gifts from God we give back to him.
In short, we want everything and everyone to fulfill us, to say to us, “You are loved!”—this is after all, in the brokenness of our sin and separation from God, our deepest need, the need to know love—true communion. Yet demanding this of the creature can only leave us empty. It is only in receiving this love from our Creator that we rediscover our true humanness and the healing of grace.”
—D. P. Cassidy, Baptism and the Beloved sermon notes.
